I found myself reflecting on the words of 1 Cor 10:13 today that states that, “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can endure it”.
Sin and bad habits have a way of entangling themselves into our lives to the point that we become enslaved to them. What starts off as a thought or a desire for simple things suddenly becomes so embedded in our lives that we are no longer able to say no or resist even what we consider harmful in the long term. Things that we once shunned or judged others about are no longer the other persons fault or mistakes but instead a thorn in our own flesh. A thorn we cannot remove despite the pain. We suddenly look back and realise that we were wrong to judge those who we thought had no self control, we realise that the power in some of these bad habits is truly beyond the doer.
There is however hope in every situation, there is the confidence we have and especially as a creation that believes in a creator, a mighty being that has power to control and to conserve, to rescue and to heal, to redeem and break every shackles that binds our hearts and minds, and to finally set one free. That mighty being for me has remained as God. I learnt over the years to stop judging others and especially when I am not the shoe wearer. The shoe may look too tight or too loose for the wearer, but it is not in my place to judge.
In my moments of reflections, in the silence of it all, I am reminded that I cannot keep going back to things that God has already rescued me from. I must soldier on, I must keep the hope that the answers that I have long waited for are along this same path, I just need to be a little more patient, a little more gentle and always remember that God will provide a way out, and will not allow me to be tempted beyond what I can bear.
I hope this helps you too. Despite your current situation, look up and try and see beyond this current phase, because right ahead, if you keep pushing on, and holding on a little longer, the light will shine again, the darkness will fade away, the discipline and the self control muscles will be stronger, and the new life will await you, as you look forward to a new you, and never have to suffer the regret of having to go back to something God has rescued you from.
God bless you!